Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Love after baby



The other day I was fluttering around the kitchen with my baby on my hip. I opened the freezer door and all of this stuff came tumbling out. My husband quickly came over and crouched behind me to gather it all up and as he placed various things back in the freezer he said...


"I was going to bite your butt but I didn't want you to drop the baby."

We erupted into laughter. This says so much about where we are in our marriage at the moment. The love is there and the laughter is easy to share yet...it's all about the kids right now. We take it where we can get it. He smacks my butt while I'm cooking dinner. We pass each other in the hallway each evening as I am heading to put Koen to bed and he is off to give Griffin a bath. We smile lovingly at one another as our shoulders brush in passing. "I'll meet you on the couch at 9" one of us will say to the other. Then, after Koen is sound asleep and Griffin is squeaky clean from his bath, the three of us pile up and read stories together before bedtime. As we read Curious George for the 1000th time and Griffin sits snugly between us, we'll play footsie and give each other flirty grins.

By the time 9 o'clock rolls around, I am a zombie and he is too. We veg out on the couch watching this and that. By 9:30 I am almost asleep. By 9:45 I am brushing my teeth. At 10:00 pm I am in bed. So much for a hot steamy night of passion. These days, the only thing I kiss is my pillow as I lay down to go to sleep.

Me and my man are like two ships passing in the night.

66 comments:

Beth P. said...

Great post. It is so wonderful to have that love for each other through everything else. Even if it is just relaxing together on the couch, any time is important!

I'm here from SITS! Have a great Tuesday!

Liz in Virginia said...

"I was going to bite your butt but I didn't want you to drop the baby."

There are people who would totally wear that on a t-shirt. A marketing idea? I'm just sayin'.

Love your blog, Leigh!

Liz at twenty-firstcenturyhousewife.blogspot.com

Lee said...

Love that post. We have passed that point of being sweet in reality, but we do still play footsies in bed while we read.

Alice in Wonderland said...

I loved this post! My Grandparents were in their 70s and still played footsie! They would sit side by side, holding each others hands and my Grandfather always treat her like a lady, opening doors for her, and carrying shopping. Sometimes they would giggle at some unknown secret known only to themselves!
It just goes to show, you are never too old!
As for the biting of bums...well, I never knew about that!

Danielle said...

I would give my husbands left 1 for 1 minute of that flirting right now.
How cute are you two? :)

Tracie said...

I'm no Love Guru but I will tell you to keep the flirting going. That will help you remember that you like each other. Eventually your kids won't be so needy and you can get back to your porn star moves. (It may take a few years though.)

And yes to Liz's idea of putting that on a t-shirt.

SPEAKING FROM THE CRIB said...

i freaking love your blog! LOVE IT! ahhh, another leigh masterpiece

BTW - you are one of the featured bloggers in this week's SFTC PRESENTS SPEAKING FROM THE LIBRARY for your laugh-worthy comments

Nicole said...

Love this and your reference to two ships passing in the night. Its kind of cute and allows you guys to build some great passion for when you guys finally have time! My husband bites my butt sometimes too:)

2Wired2Tired said...

This sounds like the routine at our house! Grand plans for the kids 8 pm naptime, but then hubby doesn't get home from work till 9 and I'm in bed by 10. Kids just wear you out. You guys are still so flirty and cute, that's awesome.

By the way, I gave you an award. Swing on over to my blog to pick it up, when you get a chance. Congrats!

Frugal Vicki said...

I love this post. This is my first time visiting and you suckered me in. I could just feel the love radiating off of you!

Kimi said...

Oh so true. We are in the same situation at the moment so I totally get it.

Tami G said...

OMG - that is the cutest thing I have read in some time. Precious is what it is... absolutely precious! and FUN!
I love it!
I'm 33 and still looking for that special man...I am holding out for what you have. LUV it!
keepin the cutesy, flirty, playful vibe alive! :)

Elle Bee said...

Love this! You are a lovely, loving family.

My husband and I--our love life has also become the victim of the little munchkins. But thankfully our friendship will carry us through til we get to sneak some passion back in!

Elle

Killara girl said...

Oh, what a sweet husband you have. I probably would've gotten a lecture, although I don't know why when he knows it doesn't work;)

Anti-Supermom said...

Exactly.

Joy said...

This is so where my and my hubby are, too! We have a 5 month old boy & 21 month old girl. We fall asleep on the couch all the time. We're still crazy about each other but just have to make adjustments now that our time revolves around our kids.
Love your blog!
joyandleia.blogspot.com

Working Mommy said...

This is absolutely the truth with the man and I...our schedules are so different that we barely see each other - when we do, though, he makes it a point to bite when I'm not holding the babe! LOL!

~WM

Cranky Mommy said...

Don't worry, it won't be too long before there's more than a smack on the butt as he passes by!

visiting from SITS

Crystal Escobar said...

haha, lovin your blog.
So fun to flirt with the hubby.
I'm a first time visitor, and now a new follower :)

Jessica said...

It's so nice to see that connection between a married couple. I think it's quite often that people forget to act like that. I'm not married, or close to it, but I still enjoy keeping that part of my relationship alive, as well.

May you have many happy (and blessed) years of marriage!

Kelly Miller said...

I think it's great that you and your husband are still flirty and sweet with each other despite the parenting and the marriage-ing and all.

cat said...

What a great post and it does sound so familiar.

Caroline said...

Love this. Sounds like our routine as well!

sweetjeanette said...

Stopping by from SITS on your day! I knew the honeymoon was over when he refused to let me put my cold feet against him. (so I come to bed after he's asleep and, well, lets just say, I'm warm and toasty)

congrats on your SITS day!

Judy@grammyreads.com said...

Your husband is so funny! After 32 years, mine can turn any situation or comment into something sexual...and I still laugh every time. I hope it never ends.

Jennifer Vanderbeek said...

Stopping by from SITS...

Such a cute post, really makes the point that you can make love work even when you're too tired to show it. Love it!

Unknown said...

Stopping by from SITS! Loved your post. My parents were always obviously hot for each other and I think my hubby and I also do a good job of showing our four boys how much fun a marriage should be. Your kids will really benefit from knowing that their parents actually LIKE each other. As for passing in the night - you'll probably have to steal some moments during the day at some point or another! LOL

said...

Nice little family life vignette you wrote there!

Congrats on your SITS day!

Randa Derkson said...

That is a great post, and how true.

LisaDay said...

But love is still there. Congrats.

Happy SITS day.

LisaDay

Laura said...

That's the way life is when you have kids...busy but good.

Happy SITS Day!

Unknown said...

This is a real illustration of how a happy marriage works when there are little children involved. You don't have to have hot steamy nights to know that the passion is still alive...those little flirty glances still make me feel all fluttery. :)

Kearsie said...

This is a bit like the romance me and my Hubs have. It's usually

1. I get home, begin cooking dinner

2. me and my girls eat dinner

3. I clean up from dinner, make a plate for my Hubs

4. Get girls in showers

5. Hubs comes home, eats the cold dinner

6. Get girls in bed

7. Deal with bathroom, drinks of water and the random excuse to get out of bed

8. Sit down on couch to watch TV and/or a movie.

9. Hubs falls asleep on couch

10. I stare at him snoring and wonder when our lives became so exciting.

Joann Mannix said...

Hi!!! I'm over from SITS and the first thing I have to say is, we are soul sisters in our hatred for all housework, evident by the name of MY blog, Laundry Hurts My Feelings. As soon as I saw your blog title, I knew we'd be blog friends.

What a beautiful post and tribute to a healthy marriage. It's so great that you guys realize that this is a moment and that's all it is. So many get caught up in the resentment that evolves when all the attention needs to be focused on the little ones, the ones who, at that age, require a lot.

It gets SO much better, just so you know. My 3 girls are teens and pre-teens and my husband and I feel like it's the old days when we had all this freedom. Babysitters are no longer required. The kids are semi-independent. Life is sweet!

Love your blog. I'll be back.

Anonymous said...

What a cozy, sweet love you share with your hubby. It's the everyday, ordinary, and funny moments that define our relationships.

Stopping by from SITS. What fun blog you have! I scrolled down the first page and liked what I saw...I'll definitely be back! :)

Unknown said...

Ah, this brings back a lot of memories. When our twins were small, we would be so happy they were asleep we'd rush to get ready for bed, as sleep was such a precious gift.
Sleep is overrated, loving your kids is the best!
You have a lovely way of writing.......stopping by from SITS!

Aleta said...

I cracked up laughing with the comment from your hubby. Greg and I don't have children, but I imagine he would say something like that too if we did. Laughter is SO important!!

Marie said...

Awesome that y'all do connect and keep things going!
Happy SITs day!

Annie @ astonesthrowfrominsanity said...

Yes. Hubs and I are also two ships passing in the night. A weekly date night helps, but I think we both realize that these days with our little ones are going by sooooo quickly. We have each other forever!

BTW, do you all talk in code in front of the kids like we do? We used the scene from sex in the city where they were talking about "coloring" to talk in front of the kids. ie Do you want to color tonight? Yes! I want to color outside the lines!

Ridiculous, yes. But it gets he job done!

Patricia said...

boy know what that's like. That would be the only reason we're looking forward to the kids moving out. *L* Or maybe just getting old enough to go downstairs and get their own breakfast while mommy and daddy "sleep" in.

Kim said...

Stopping by SITS. You have a great marriage and I'm wishing you many more years of the same. I just love this post as it says so much!

Kim
The Misplaced Midwesterner

Katherine said...

This was really sweet! I love seeing the different ways my marriage matures and evolves as we get older and life gets more hectic!

Marie said...

Ahhh it sounds like you have a great marriage. :)

Unknown said...

Great and real story. Nice read. You can feel the strength in your husband's relationship.

Sarah Baron
www.anonymous8.com

Anonymous said...

So sweet. I hope my marriage ends up like yours!

Ya'll are so cute :)

metta1313 said...

Sounds like something my husband would do. Isn't it great at least to laugh like that with your hubby.

LindaFaye said...

Well said. I think so many of us know exactly how you feel!!

See Mom Smile said...

We used to be ships but now the kids are a little older we can be UPS trucks that stop more frequently! Congrats on being the SITS FB. Enjoy your day.

Maxie Gregg said...

Happy SITS day! Your post brought back memories. Thank you!

Anonymous said...

It's good that you can keep the magic alive in some way!

Kim said...

Aw!
and DITTO!
My husband pitched a tent in our living room the other night (took up the whole room) and turned on a DVD of a fire roaring.

SO SWEET!

and I'm a fan of butt pinching too.

Young Wife said...

Stopping by from SITS. What a cute post!

Jodi Widhalm said...

Sweet post and so true! My boys are 2, 5 and 7. We've been changing diapers non-stop for almost 8 years now. We love it, though, and wouldn't trade it for anything! Happy SiTS day!

Carrie said...

So true...here's hoping those ships crash into each other now and again ;)

Visiting from SITS

Heather (One Take On Life) said...

Love this post, so can relate. Stopping by from SITS and following you now. Love that you keep it real.

Skooks said...

Visiting from SITS. This post sounds a lot like my life lately. My daughter is almost 3 and my son is 6 months old. We're busy. But still very much in love. :)

Sarah and the Gentlemen said...

That's so funny! and so relate-able.

Not Everyones Mama said...

That is classic! Man, ours are 11, 5, 3, and just turned 1 this week and I don't even remember what my husband looks like. LOL Ok, I know what he looks like - from all the way over on the other side of the bed, as I wave over the 2 youngest who found their way in there again.

twinkietotmom said...

Sounds exactly like my husband and I...isn't it amazing what kids do for a marriage...but I wouldn't have it any other way right now! This moment in our lives will only be a moment an before we know it the house will be filled with just us two again!

Unknown said...

We've certainly all been THERE! As long as you can laugh your way through it!

Have a great SITS day!

The Green Family said...

LOL! Loved it Ü I'm reading this while my hubby puts Jayden (4) to bed reading Winnie the Pooh for the millionth time and I just got done putting Casey (7 months) to bed. Last night he slept through the night for the first time!

At least with passion, 'absence makes the heart grow fonder' or extremly sexualy frustrated ;)

Lorri S said...

I'm more of a night person than day person...he is asleep before 9pm usually and I'm wide awake.

You make everything seem so fun :)

Julie {Angry Julie Monday} said...

My husband and I sometimes live parallel lives. So I totally understand what you mean. And gosh, we only have one kid.

Leslie Harris said...

That is true love! :D

Astrid in Bristling Acres said...

Ah yes...the life of parents with young children. I remember being there a few years ago. Heck, I'm still just thinking about it! Great post!

Miz Dinah said...

Oh that sounds like my life. Minus one kid. Well, it's the thought that counts, right?