First my heart filled with fear, then my heart felt utter relief, and now it is full of deep sadness or: my crazy day.

I went on a grand adventure today to Atlanta for the Top Chef Tasting Tour with Roger. He took a long lunch and my Mom watched the boys at her house so that we could have a "date". We had a great time. Little did I know that I was being spared serious trauma.

As I drove home from my fun adventure into the city, I noticed in the distance that a helicopter was hovering in the air over what looked to be my neighborhood. I thought it odd but shrugged it off. Then, two police cars came barreling behind me. I pulled over and let them pass but was behind a slow poke so I didn't get to see where they were headed.

I went to my Mom's house and fetched my kiddos. As we drove to my neighborhood, a Crime Scene Unit passed us. Something big had happened somewhere. My heart started racing. As I pulled into my neighborhood, I noticed a big firetruck sitting at the entrance. I thought...Oh no, it's a fire. I rushed to get to my home to make sure that it was in one piece.

Let me interject here and tell you about my neighborhood real quick. It's a sleepy little neighborhood that is very rural. Every house is an Estate and has tons of property. We live in the smallest house on the smallest 2 acre lot. It's quiet and most of my neighbors are reclusive professors who keep to themselves.

This is a stock photo...not one of mine.

You can imagine my shock when I was met with a 5 car Police blockade on my main road, one block from my house. A female officer was speaking to a man in a truck in front of me. He turned his truck around and left. My heart pounded in my chest as I rolled down the window

"Is everything okay, officer? Is there anything I need to know about my neighborhood." I asked her. She looked in the backseat and saw my two boys. She then very coldly said "Go inside your home and lock the doors. Don't answer the door for anybody!" I then asked "Is it safe , should I leave?" She looked over her shoulder at all of the male officers gathered and then leaned into my car door. She very quietly looked at my boys and said "TURN AROUND NOW AND DON'T COME HOME UNTIL YOU GET THE OKAY." I booked it out of there.

As I turned on the road to leave my neighborhood, I passed my mom in her car. She looked frantic. We pulled over and she dropped the bomb on me. "Three people have been shot in your neighborhood and the killer is at large. It's an all out manhunt. Go to my house." She was trembling. "Here, call Scarlet (one of my closest friends) she is looking for you and wants to know that your safe!"

I called on my Mom's cell and we chatted. It turns out that a woman with a one week old baby was shot and killed. Her mother and sister had been shot too. The baby was okay. The man who shot them was unaccounted for. My heart broke. My stomach turned into knots. I had two sweet boys looking at me through the car window with question marks on their faces. My heart sank...I told Griffin that there was a gas leak and we couldn't go home.

They have since found the man. He locked himself in the bathroom and shot himself in the chest. He's alive and was taken the hospital. The mother of the baby is dead and the two other women lived. It looks to be a case of domestic violence.

After hours of wondering and worrying about when I could return to my home, I knew that it was okay to go to my house. When I got home, I had 10 messages from different friends calling to check in on me. They all sounded so worried that they couldn't get a hold of me. I sobbed as I listened to each one and was so thankful that we had been spared the police sirens and the scariness of the realization that a murderer was loose in my neighborhood. I envisioned my fear as I ran to the car to flee my home. Thank God we were safe and sound at my Mothers' house. It also means so much to have friends that love and care about me. It's almost heartbreaking.

Then, I just read about it on my computer and saw this photo of the baby.

(photo from WSB TV)

My heart is shaken.
It's all just so tragic.
I want to grab that baby and love her.
She is in State Custody at one week old.

Now I have to go and bake cookies for a bake sale at Griffin's school tomorrow.
I feel so lucky to be safe and sound and doing something as nurturing as baking cookies.
I'm hugging my children a little tighter tonight.