Motherhood and milestones

It's amazing to me how there are times in motherhood where I coast a bit. The status quo is good. People are eating from every food group. No one is having nightmares. Everyone's clothes are just the right size and all is happy and normal in my home. Then, suddenly, things start to shift with my children. The baby rolls over and we all clap in celebration. My 4 year old may try a new food and we all jump for joy.

Over the last month or so, Griffin has taken a developmental leap. He's had growing pains and we've many discussions about the looming fate of death and all of the fears that manifest from that. He's had a bully on the playground torture him with taunts and we have had many talks about that as well. It amazes me the depth that my son has.

Yesterday we were playing ball together when he suddenly grew quiet and look sad. I asked him what was wrong and his response was so heartbreakingly beautiful that it floored me. He said "I'm sad because I will miss this when I'm an old man." His eyes welled up with tears and I just sat down and he crawled into my lap. It was all I could do not to cry with him. I just can't believe that a four year old would have that much insight. I feel the exact same way. I will miss all of this too. The struggles and the triumphs. I will miss the times when I scour the Internet to find just the right book to gently help him understand death. I will miss sitting on the couch with him and helping him understand his own emotions. I will miss playing cops and robbers with him in the front yard.

I can feel him changing by the minute. My sweet 4 year old is almost 5 and as he reaches these emotional milestones, I must change with him. I must let go a bit and give him space to be independent. I need to give him the tools to overcome things on his own. He needs to discover his own strengths. I will be there for him with a hug when he needs it. We will grow together. I told him that we need to enjoy the present because there will be so much for him to remember fondly when he is an old man. It's humbling when your child teaches you a lesson because I need to learn this too. The art of living for the moment,

and in the midst of all of this...

Look who's sitting up!