Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Leigh vs. Christmas Cookies

It's time for the second annual cookie exchange at my mom's best friend's house this evening. I am not a baker by nature. As a matter of fact, it would be safe to say that my oven hates me. Having only recently recovered from the Cupcake Battle of 2009, I thought that I would be kind to myself and make a simple cookie this year. My inspiration came from a Nestle Christmas Cookie recipe book that I had thumbed through while waiting in line and fussing with my 4 year old at Walmart. I settled on these delicious yet easy enough to make cookies.

Berry Chocolate Cookie Tartlets

*clearly, these are not my cookies*

I won't go into too many details about my defeat but I will say that in the end of what I will call
"The Christmas Cookie incident of 2009", I ended up moaning on the couch with a tummy ache from licking the cookie dough spoon and complaining to Roger about what a horrible cook I am. I said very self loathing things like "What's wrong with me? I mean, how hard is it to bake a damn cookie?" or "Those are the ugliest things I have ever seen in my life, I suck!" Roger would then say sweet things like "Well, they taste good" in which I would reply "Yeah, but if Martha Stewart made them they would taste good and look pretty" and then he'd say "I think that they're pretty" and then I'd roll my eyes and say "They look like a drunk ape made them!"

19 comments:

singedwingangel said...

lmbo ya know what so what if they aren't pretty or perfect. You tried and they taste good and hello they are not gonna be pretty after they are obliterated by the guests lol..

Amanda {My Life Badly Written} said...

Good on you for giving them a go!! Tummy aches from cookie dough are better than from undercooked chicken (I don't know if that makes you feel better but I am trying!!)
:)

BigSis said...

We don't really want to be like Martha do we? I mean she went to jail and all... You are doing just fine!

RosyRevolver said...

Listen here, ladyfriend. Any kind of a cookie recipe that includes the word "tartlet" in the title is far too advanced for my culinary skills.

I seriously just want to take a moment to applaud the diversion from the typical road of "break and bake" that a lot of us ladies tend to travel. You rock.

Oh, and you're funny.
And Martha's not.

Funny beats "makes pretty cookies" any day.

Leigh: 1
Martha: 0

xo

Daffy said...

A drunk ape! That's funny right thar...I don't care who ya are.

Let's look on the bright side, if you aren't skilled at baking that means you have to leave the house to go in search of sweets. Most days I don't want them badly enough to get in the car and drive to the store. Ergo no conSUMO :O)

My sister set my parents oven on fire one year....like FLAMES SHOOTING OUT SMOKE ALARM BLARING kind of fire. She was baking Lasgna...I don't know how either but it happened.

Daffy said...

OH...and it doesn't look pretty coming out so who cares if it looks pretty going in?

boots said...

your hilarious- but you did start with a pretty intense cookie- give your self a break- sugar cookies are delicious and simple :)

Erin said...

Leigh---I have had many a baking fail myself. To this day I am sad because I cannot make my own pie crust. My mom makes kick-ass pie crust from scratch, but she did not share that gene with me.

Cookies? I like the recipe on the back of the chocolate morsels bag. So easy! If I can do it, anyone can do it!

MamaOtwins+1 said...

I needed the laugh this morning, and the scorecard did it for me. Next year I'll make some cookies and ship them to you and you can pretend you made them. No one will ever know. ;)

Theta Mom said...

*Clearly these are not my cookies.* Wouldn't be mine either! lol

Danielle said...

I just went to my first cookie exchange this weekend. I paid my aunt to make mine. Shhhh.

Working Mommy said...

Those cookies look delightful! I'm jealous!

~WM

blueviolet said...

Wait, I see her messing up on her show all the time!!! It's her assistants that are the pros! ;)

SPEAKING FROM THE CRIB said...

we are in the same boat girl. nothing i make looks good or tastes good. sometimes might taste good but NEVER looks good. sigh

thatgirlblogs said...

If they taste good, I'm in. Thanks for visiting me on my SITS day, that was great!

Lisa said...

I totally get anxious about the appearance of food that has to go public; but if it's just for my own enjoyment, they can look like sin and I won't care as long as they taste good.

Busted Kate said...

Hey, I'm a drunk ape and my cookies look awesome! Don't you compare your cookies to mine...

:-)

Crystal said...

At least you tried. Just be sure not to attempt gluten free cookies. Martha wouldn't even be able to make those things tasty...

kys said...

Perfection is highly over-rated. That's what I tell myself anyway! (LOL)