Thursday, September 10, 2009

Operation: Pin Up Girl

I am the queen of putting make up on in the car. Most days at about 8:20 am you can find find me putting on lipstick as we sit at a stop light on the way to taking Griffin to school. You might see me brushing mascara on at a stop sign as I make my way to the grocery store. I try to put my best face forward because my grandma raised me right when she taught me to never leave the house without at least a little lipstick and mascara on your tired face.

Well, something's rotten in Denmark because the other morning as I drove Griffin to school I pulled up to the stop light, looked in the mirror poised to put on my lipstick, and said aloud "why bother?"

Now, it's been 6 days since I put on lipstick.

I have officially let myself go. I vowed that I would never ever be one of those moms who just quits making an effort to like nice. Somehow, I have ended up at the bottom of my own list. So, it's time to make a new vow to myself. I don't want to look like a haggard old mama, not this girl. No, I want to look like a pin up girl. For that to happen I've got to start thinking and acting like a sex pot. So...I am making a few promises to myself.

I vow to always put on lipstick
BEFORE I walk out the door.
My mom always says
"Feeling a little down?
Put on a little lipstick and you'll feel better!"
She's so right.

I vow to shower more often.
I suppose that this is step one to grooming, huh?
Cat baths are fine but not when you
do it 5 days in a row.
No one likes a stinky lady.
Spritzing Coco Chanel Perfume on your armpits
before you walk out the door
does not count as bathing!

I vow to shave my legs more than once a month.
No self respecting Pin Up Girl has hairy legs.
This goes for all hair upkeep.
I must get my eyebrows waxed, wax my lip,
and (gasp) pluck my chin hairs that are popping out,
they've gotta go too.

I vow to exercise more.
Walking from the couch to the refrigerator
to get another Diet Dr. Pepper
does not count as physical activity.
It's time to bust out my
Denise Austin workout DVD and
get off my lazy ass.
Pin Up Girls do not have huge asses.

I vow to eat better and actually step on the scale.
Admitting there is a problem is the first step.
Then second step will be onto
that cruel scale to access the damage.
A good Pin Up Girl does
not eat 2 chocolate covered doughnuts
while she walks around Walmart.

I vow to spend more time on myself.
The last book I read was
What to Expect in the First Year.
I need to feed my brain.
There is nothing sexier than
a smart girl.

Okay, it's official. Vows have been spoken here today.

I am well on my way to achieving ultimate sexiness.


Bridgette said...

Great post!!! I need to do all those things too. I have let my self go since I was laid off.

Dropping in from SITS!!! Have a great day!

Cat said...

My mom was a car-makeup-putter-on-er. My childhood was spent sqwaking in alarm, scrunching my eyes closed against oncoming death, and learning how to drive with my knees.

Good for you! And nice to "meet" you.

vanilla said...

My spouse, cosmetologist by profession, is so proud of you for your resolve. I enjoyed the accompanying pix!

Atlanta said...

LMAO! I like those! Keep it up! Let me know how it goes and maybe I'll try it too! I was putting on lipsick in the car and my daughter asked "Mom, why is the car driving itself?" heheh woops.

JaelCustomDesigns said...

Popping in from SITS!
Great Post, Love the pics! I was going to get a pin up girl tattoo or a geisha girl tattoo. I think they are beautiful!

I'm always trying to preserve my sexy, but with four kids a husband, full itme job, and small business... I tend to neglect myself a bit. Lol I'm working on it!

Noah's Mommy said...

Here Here...I think I need to pin these up on my wall....I've been horrible lately!

Lee the Hot Flash Queen said...

I am in total agreement about everything but the make up...can't do it!

Alexandra said...

I need to do each and everyone of those things! As a mom it is so easy to let things slip. Not anymore... I am going to put forth an effort to really stick to all of these.


love the post - love the pics. we all do it. we get fat, then we stop getting our hair cut AND colored, then we stop putting on blush, then eyeshadow, then lipstick ... it's a slippery slope

btw i'll make sure to give kate the latest copy of Short Hairstyles 101

Theta Mom said...

OMG! Amen sister! Where have you been all of my bloggy life?! LOL

This is just what the doctor ordered and we are so getting our groove back. Thanks so much for stopping by my blog. I will follow you! :)

WhiteSockGirl said...

"There is nothing sexier than
a smart girl."

Really? I thought most men find the girls with most of the mass in the bra area sexy,.. and the girls with the most of the mass in the brain area not so sexy,..

Lemme grab a book and try this,..